Gabrielle's Awakening
Evolution of an Affair
Eternal Triangle
In Honor Bound
 
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Gabrielle's Awakening: Chapter One

 

Self-Published by Alexandra Adams. © 1995 by Alexandra Adams

 
 
 
 

Warm fog swirled around the woman in the shower. The forceful spray set the nerve-endings in her skin tingling; the hot water coursing down her nude flesh induced a feeling of hedonistic abandonment. Groping for the control, she turned off the barrage of droplets, and lathered her upper body with fragrant soap. Sudsy rivulets coursed down smooth white skin, mimicking caressing finger-strokes tracing sinuous curves. Beguiled into dwelling on their slow, sensuous descent, Gabrielle cupped a firm breast in one hand, and soaped the soft skin beneath it. Her thumb inadvertently brushed the nipple, sending tantalizing impulses racing down hypersensitive nerves. A foam-finger insinuated itself between her thighs, riveting her attention on the most intimate part of herself.

Yielding to an irresistible urge, the bather slid a palm between legs that without conscious volition, she spread wide apart. Little gusts of breath hissed between delicately bowed lips that parted to accommodate their expulsion. Employing her right hand as her left still cupped a breast and teased the nipple, she massaged the clit swelling now with need, even as the image of the man due to arrive shortly took surreally clear form in her mind. Hot, sticky essence erupted into the cunt into which three fingers avidly dipped before continuing their vigorous manipulation of the now lavishly lubricated organ of pleasure.

The masturbator’s sphincters loosened. She gained a sense of opening, of spreading, of yielding, of abdicating the last vestige of control over the body she imagined to be fucked by the man she desperately wished would care for her other than as a friend. Shivers, heat flooding into quivering loins, waves of blissful tremors coursing upwards from the rigid shaft protruding from the folds of tender flesh which normally hooded it: that magical combination of exquisite sensations led almost instantly to climax. The paroxysm of internal contractions the woman experienced as the epicenter from which wave after shuddering wave of pleasure expanded relentlessly outwards.

Gratified by her success, she stood motionless for a time, savoring the rush that ebbed all too soon, leaving frustration at the aridity of her sexual life in its wake. Sighing, she reached for the control, and set the forceful spray scouring the last traces of foam from her skin.

I owe Michael a major debt, Gabrielle reminded herself as she dressed. I don’t know how I’d have coped last week, but for his smooth handling of the funeral arrangements, and his help with the tangled financial mess arising from Richard’s dying right in the middle of the court proceedings. Suing Richard for divorce took a dreadful toll on my emotional balance, despite our living apart this past six months—and then to have him die so suddenly, in so ghastly a fashion! That drunk driver must have been doing ninety when he ran that stop sign. Michael assured me that Richard died instantly, but still...

Pain blended with an onslaught of guilt that the surviving spouse knew to be irrational. Richard wasn’t even driving, she reminded herself. Random happenstance, that triple fatality. Evil luck. The hot desire we initially felt for each other died long before the wreck: years ago. Why he balked at letting me go, I’ll never figure out. Does Michael know, I wonder? They were close associates in a business sense...but were they good enough friends that Richard might have confided in Michael? No. I doubt that he ever unbent that far with any friend, however close.

Clad now in a stylish black pantsuit which breathed respectability without offering the least suggestion of dowdiness, her perfectly coiffed short hair falling in soft waves around a face devoid of makeup except for a dusting of powder and a light application of rosy lipstick, Gabrielle surveyed her image in the bedroom mirror, and sighed again. No one would take you for other than the scholar you are, she chided herself. You look like the eminently respectable author of three critically acclaimed commentaries on medieval history. You project absolutely no blatant sexiness—none of the exotic allure of the women Michael escorted to the annual shareholders’ dinners, after Richard’s company undertook to manufacture those unique electronic components Michael invented. A different woman each time, each more striking than the last.

Enigma, John Michael Rakoczy. Courtly, assured, urbane...but unfathomable. Why did he do me so inestimable a favor this past two weeks? Richard called him a recluse—couldn’t believe he’d appear at those company dinners. But Michael not only came, he lent a magical aura to the table we four shared, and made me feel when we danced as if my glass-shod feet trod on air, and my coach totally lacked the power to turn back into a pumpkin.

A musical chime sent the hostess conscious that her heart fibrillated, hurrying to the entry of her quaintly rustic townhouse. Throwing open the door, she smiled warmly on the commanding figure standing on the threshold, noting in a split-second appraisal the casual elegance of the suit she unerringly judged to be costly, the impeccably correct tie, the stylish shirt, the imported shoes buffed to perfection. “Come in, Michael. Why, thank you! Does this need to be refrigerated?”

“It’s at its best cool, not chilled. If you care to sample it, I’ll open the bottle, Gabrielle. It’s more pleasant before dinner, than after.”

“By all means, open it. Dinner’s in the Crock-Pot; we can eat any time. I didn’t dare make a stab at choosing wine for a connoisseur—figured on playing it safe by whipping up a batch of whiskey sours.” Waving a hand towards the small, well-stocked bar, Gabrielle let the cosmopolite she knew to possess a most discerning taste in wines serve his offering.

“Ahh! You do that with such ease!” she commended him.

“Comes with practice.”

The setting out of goblets, the popping of the cork from the cobweb-streaked bottle deftly wrapped in a towel, the careful pouring of the sparkling wine, seemed to the hostess exquisitely aware of her guest’s raw masculine appeal, a ritual fraught with sensual significance. His voice, melodious, cultured, set up sympathetic vibrations in some obscure receptor in her brain, causing her to see him through superclear air. She experienced a heightened awareness of the carnal urges still tormenting her, despite her self-achieved respite. Seating herself in a plush chair, she took the long-stemmed glass he proffered, smiling with friendly warmth as he settled with fluid grace onto the couch.

Raising his glass, Michael proposed a toast. “To your future happiness, Gabrielle.”

Moved by the wish that came across as wholly sincere, the widowed intellectual raised her own goblet, even as her face betrayed doubt that the wish would be granted. “I thank you,” she responded softly. “Without your help this past two weeks, I’d never have gotten through the trauma.”

“You’d have coped, but I took pleasure in relieving you of the need. Tantalizing bouquet, mm?”

“I’m no judge of wines, Michael, but if you served this to a connoisseur whose palate equaled yours, he’d genuflect before imbibing it, would he not?”

An appreciative laugh greeted that observation. An unconstrained silence fell as hostess and guest sipped slowly, savoring the costly vintage. During the silent interval, Gabrielle filed her benefactor’s image in a mind trained to observe and interpret minute details. Lean hawk-features of no especial comeliness seemed ageless to her.

Michael could be any age between forty and sixty, she judged ruminatively. His face exhibits strong character beneath that whimsical smile lacking the least hint either of arrogance or condescension. He wears his hair rather long, but beautifully styled. Brown hair...and tawny brown eyes curiously flecked with yellow. Those compelling eyes strike me as his most intriguing feature. An arresting face, expressive, changeful, but one he controls perfectly. Why did he go out of his way to help a widow who’d proved herself implacably determined to divorce a husband whose friendship Michael obviously valued?

Gratitude prompted a smile that the shrewd beholder correctly perceived as purely friendly—free of any subtle overtone conveying sexual invitation. Musingly, the guest studied the woman seated opposite, as if to etch her beguiling image into his mental files. Dark hair devoid of a single strand of gray framed a piquant face characterized by an appealing vibrancy. Small, inoffensive crinkles at the corners of liquid dark eyes—creases most prominent when their owner laughed—accentuated the uniform smoothness of high forehead, rose-tinted cheeks, patrician nose, and dimpled chin. Dark brows arched over those wide-set eyes shaded by long lashes, in striking contrast to the creaminess of skin assiduously shielded from the sun. Knowing Gabrielle to be forty-nine, the connoisseur of more than wine admiringly acknowledged that she looked no older than thirty-five.

Over the spicy dish of beef and vegetables served with crusty homemade bread and a tasty salad, the hostess chatted animatedly and wittily, as did the guest whose business ventures resulted in his possessing intimate knowledge of a score of foreign countries. At the conclusion of the leisured meal, Michael smoothly insisted on tidying the kitchen while the hostess loaded the dishwasher.

When his companion preceded him into the living room, he caught up to her. Slipping his arms around her from behind, he held her for a few seconds pressed against his lean torso, calculatedly assessing her response. When he turned her to face him, she congealed against his chest, her guileless, upturned countenance nakedly betraying hot need.

No trace of his fierce satisfaction did Michael let show. Lifting her, he carried her to the couch, settling her so that she sat in his lap with her head resting on his shoulder. “You sorely needed what Richard failed abysmally to give you, this past ten years, eh, little staunch-heart?” he murmured in her ear, smiling knowingly as she melted against him.

Succumbing to shock, Gabrielle stiffened. “I can’t discuss...how did you...” Her normally assured voice broke off abruptly, as the painful flush suffusing her face deepened.

“He confided in me, one night, nine years ago, after downing four shots of brandy on an empty stomach. The liquor melted his habitual reserve—led him to reveal that he suffered from periodic bouts of impotence,” came the equable reply. “I urged him to consult a competent medical specialist, and kept what he told me strictly to myself. When your frustration finally drove you to sue for divorce, you refused to use that wholly legitimate leverage in court. Instead, you employed the far more vague charge of irreconcilable differences, out of concern for his feelings. You likewise refrained from demanding the exorbitant share of his wealth that any other wife divorcing a successful corporate founder would consider her due.

“I admire your integrity, Gabrielle. Rest assured that Richard’s secret’s as safe in my keeping as it is in yours.” His mellifluous voice an aural caress, Michael murmured cajolingly, “You’ve built up a backlog of excruciating need, mm? Longed for a partner who knows better than you do yourself, what will arouse you...what will lift you to heights of rapture unparalleled in your experience?”

“Yes.” That bald admission came couched in a tremulous whisper. Longing so intense as to equate with physical pain rose out of depths in the widowed historian’s psyche that she scarcely knew existed.

Accurately gauging the potency of that yearning, Michael launched a campaign to engineer an outcome long envisioned, but impossible to achieve until now. Not troubling to hide his amusement, he laughed softly, cocking his head as he spoke. “You’ll need to shed a burden of crippling inhibitions, little innocent—violate some deeply ingrained notions of propriety. I warn you, I possess tastes guaranteed to shock you.”

Liquid doe-eyes widened, but no hint of wariness surfaced; no fear flitted across the face in which nascent hope dawned. “Perhaps they will. I’m dreadfully ignorant,” came the spirited rebuttal. “I need to be shocked, Michael!”

A hearty laugh, not in the least derisive, greeted that vehement admission. “So you do. Stand up, and face me.”

Rising, Gabrielle obeyed, conscious of a loosening in her loins paralleling that achieved earlier while bathing. Color flooded her cheeks; delicately bowed lips again parted.

“Strip to the buff,” her guest ordered in a lazy drawl, seeming to the woman unhesitatingly obeying his directive to be the epitome of debonair nonchalance.

The speed with which she complied provoked inward mirth in the worldly sensualist well aware that her cultural programming rendered her incapable of making on her own initiative a brazen sexual overture even to a man she passionately desired. When she stood naked, he commanded, “Clasp your hands behind your head, and make a full turn.”

Flushing scarlet, Gabrielle complied, the tangible impact of the glance tracing her every curve sending galvanic impulses down nerves strung to their limit. Feeling like a slave exhibited for sale to some languidly critical Oriental potentate, she grew aware of the wetness gushing into her cunt. Shivers raced across her abdomen; her nipples hardened into a semblance of pink rocks.

Amber-flecked cat’s-eyes minutely examining a fine-boned, delicately contoured feminine body observed with satisfaction the absence of any excess fat, or any offensive flab. Muscles kept firm by frequent exercise flowed easily beneath unblemished skin. The rounded breasts and curvaceous hips the intent observer saw to be no whiter than the vividly expressive face, the shapely arms, the long-fingered hands sporting no tan whatsoever. The ample breasts lacked the uplift that undoubtedly characterized them in Gabrielle’s youth, but the sight of that soft white flesh set the beholder’s loins stirring. He noted that she shaved her legs and armpits, but obviously never dreamed that a lover might prefer that she dispense with a thatch of crisply curling pussy-hair. “Come here,” he ordered. “Lie on your back, with your ass-cheeks in my lap.”

Nothing in her prior experience of callow lovers taken at infrequent intervals during her university days, or of the husband who gained her lasting affection but failed nine times out of ten to lift her to orgasm, prepared Gabrielle for the impact to her sensibilities delivered by this near-stranger who cast so powerfully erotic a spell. Disposing her body as he desired, she obeyed his peremptory directive to spread her legs.

Lying along the couch, her arms thrown back over her head, her legs thrust wide apart, so that one hung down over the front of the seat, she quivered visibly. Hot shivers rippled through her abdominal area. Her clit, engorged, protruding from its folds, formed the focal point of the raw lust befogging her mind: a primal craving which the scholar found herself graphically comparing to that experienced by a bitch-dog in heat. The emission produced by that compelling carnal urge dribbled onto her outthrust thighs as she consciously willed the man minutely scrutinizing her most private parts to thrust his cock into her. Her breath coming now in explosive little bursts, she all but begged aloud that he take her to bed.

“Vulnerable, you are, in your need, eh, little hedonist?” he inquired lazily, his amusement patent to the woman longing for the touch of his forefinger on her stiff clit. “Well...so am I, in mine. You want a lover who’ll drive his prick up your hot, wet cunt, and lift you to ecstasy for a night, or perhaps only for the span of an hour, after which he’ll obligingly leave. You envision a gallant admirer who’ll court you exactly as did your late husband, fourteen years ago: take you to dinner, to the theater, to concerts, or whatever, and perhaps, at some future point, beg you to marry him. You’ve no notion whatsoever that any other course lies open to either of us. But what I want falls in that latter category. Shall I outline what I want—what I’ll demand, if you don’t rise up in wrath at this pivotal juncture, and order me out of your house?”

Frozen into paralysis by that wholly unexpected challenge, Gabrielle went taut as she digested it. Suppressing an instinctive impulse to leap up in acute disarray and clutch at the clothing scattered about the rug, she succumbed to the magnetic, mocking smile wreathing the face of the man whose monumental self-assurance amazed her. “Tell me,” she breathed, as the tension abruptly drained from the body draped over the lap of the guest whose elegant attire exhibited no rumpling whatsoever.

“I want a slave, Gabrielle. A submissive, obedient slave who offers herself unreservedly to a demanding master who’ll use her lovely body exactly as he wishes. A pliant, yielding slave not only willing, but eager to undergo the rigorous training he’ll conduct, so as to mold her into a partner perfect for him. A passionate, uninhibited slave who gives herself with total abandon when he deigns to prove himself a master of erotic art.”

Shock so great that it impaired Gabrielle’s ability to reason momentarily deprived her of speech. Her ability to employ logic shattered, she reacted on a basis of raw emotion originating in her nonverbal, intuitive right brain. A startling sense that she wanted to submit to this man so utterly unlike any she had ever known—a bemused realization that the word “slave” resonated uncannily on some subliminal level with an elemental, inchoate, intense yearning—took firm hold in her diminished consciousness.

Stifling an urge to rear up and confront the impudent autocrat making that outrageous proposal, she instead relinquished all control of the body that melted over Michael’s lap like a flow of honey spilled on a slope. “You didn’t exaggerate when you said I’d find your tastes shocking,” she rasped hoarsely. “But I want what I suspect you’ll give me...eventually. I need it...far more than I realized, all these years. I offer myself as your...slave.”

Fiercely exultant at having gained what he half expected would elude him, the guest raked the nude body arched across his thighs, with eyes gone dark with passion. No other evidence of the emotion gripping him showed on the mobile face so perfectly obedient to his will. “Mm. Easy to say—even to think, little adventuress. But before I’ll consider initiating you into a mode of living totally foreign to your experience, you’ll pass a test designed to assess the strength of the resolution you just made. So.”

Smiling into eyes that for the first time betrayed fear, Michael slipped a hand into the pocket of his suit-coat. Gabrielle stared apprehensively at the small item he held up for her perusal: a wafer-thin golden disc, which he pressed against her pussy-hair. The slightly convex object adhered to her mound as if it had grown there. Even as she involuntarily tensed, her self-styled master slipped two thin, flat, golden rings over her nipples. The metal clung to her aureoles, held by some mysterious attractive force.

Placing a fingertip on each pink nubbin, Michael vibrated the ultrasensitive flesh, causing the nipples to stiffen, and protrude from the rings.

That sensuous touch electrified the woman whose lust surged back with primitive force. “Ohhh...that feels so good,” she breathed. Newly generated fear swiftly subsided.

The nipples remained tautly erect after the massage ceased. A hand laid itself flat on the firm flesh of the novice’s abdomen. “This device—one I invented—clings by electrostatic force: attraction generated by an electrical charge opposite to that occurring on your skin,” her guest informed her, his melodious voice detached, almost clinical in tone. “When I activate the shield, it’ll excite local nerve-endings in your skin, sending electronic impulses coursing down your nerves. That stimulation your mind will interpret as pain. The contact causes no injury, no scarring, no harm whatsoever, however intense the sensation. Because the nerves thus excited most often transmit pleasurable impulses, they’ll strive to function normally. You’ll grow conscious of a most intriguing erotic overtone blending with the pain that you’ll welcome purely because I derive pleasure from inflicting it.

“If you flinch, or stiffen, or writhe, or utter the slightest sound, you’ll fail this initial test of your willingness to please. If that happens, I’ll tuck you into your bed, and take my departure, Gabrielle—cease intruding myself into the even tenor of days as free now of stress as of sexual satisfaction. So. Go pliant, little probationer. That’s right. Stay relaxed.”

Fear, not of impending pain, but of failing to please this self-proclaimed sadist, and thereby forfeiting any hope of enlarging her meager experience of sensual pleasure, contended in Gabrielle’s clouded awareness with shock generated by his revelation. Fear rose uppermost, as a formerly stern sense of propriety ceased to operate. One clear concept held prominence in a mind gone chaotic: a frantic determination to avoid at any cost, failing this crucial test.

A long forefinger touched a rough spot on the gleaming metal shield. Pain exploded into the cognizance of the candidate braced for its onset: an agonizing stimulus unlike any in her prior experience. Waves of intense sensation radiated outward from the quivering pussy to which the shield adhered, from the tormented nipples, from the softly mounded flesh of breasts shot through with pain. Somehow, the sufferer avoided any convulsive tensing of her gut as she bit back the moan fighting for utterance.

“Ahhh...hurts, hm? Relax, little braveheart. Investigate the pain. Explore it; savor it; enjoy it. Think of the pain as the opposite side of a single sensation: the dark half without which the pleasure I’ll give you would seem incomplete. Submit, little neophyte. Offer yourself with abandon.”

The incisive commands sliced through the fog of emotion afflicting the woman striving gamely neither to stiffen, nor to writhe. “Significant, but bearable, the pain, eh?” The richly musical voice exerted irresistibly hypnotic force. “You project a most appealing innocence, Gabrielle—a most astonishing ingenuousness, for so capable a businesswoman, and so competent a scholar. You’re a natural submissive: a slave only now assuming the role for which nature designed her. That’s right. Let the pain loosen you, open you, set your juices flowing. Strive to please me, little wood sprite.”

Even as those diabolically persuasive injunctions fell on ears hypersensitive now to the mesmeric power of the man issuing them, the hearer’s sphincters went utterly slack. Flaps of tender flesh swelled and parted as her cunt opened to the worldly sensualist inflicting what amounted to agony. Her clit throbbed, more from need than from the pain suffusing it. Wetness ran down the thighs spread wide.

Controlling his hard erection with an ease born of rigorous self-training, Michael fingered the stiff little shaft, bestowing the touch the sensually deprived widow had so desperately longed for earlier. Idly, unhurriedly, he traced the circumference of the tip, noting the rapt expression overspreading the face that until now had mirrored only the distress caused by the electronic stimulus.

Gabrielle found it harder to stifle moans of pleasure than groans induced by agony. Skilled fingers marched on wet flesh, manipulating the clit the guest deftly moistened with its owner’s essence. Expertly, Michael caressed the swollen pussy-lips, and massaged the cunt gulping like a beached fish. While continuing that delectable teasing with his left hand, he thrust three fingers of the other into the orifice dribbling wetness, and moved them provocatively, thereby conferring pleasure that blended seamlessly with the pain still radiating through breasts and loins.

The invading fingers unerringly targeting an exquisitely sensitive site all but wrung a cry from the woman savaging her lip with her teeth so as to obey the command that she utter no sound. The rhythmic, steady thrusts providing heady pleasure changed abruptly to penetrations far swifter, and more forceful. Heat suffused Gabrielle’s inner thighs, flooding the love-tunnel so deliciously stimulated by the novel combination of stimuli. Her ass-cheeks grew hot; her thighs burned.

The fingers quickened their tempo. The heel of Michael’s hand pressed against the golden disc, causing shuddering waves of pain to ripple outward from the intensely stimulated mound. Working the heel of the hand against the non-shifting shield, he caused the flesh beneath the pussy-hair to rock back and forth, and then rotate even as two lavishly lubricated fingers rubbed along the sides of the engorged clit.

As her mind narrowed its focus to dwell exclusively on those indescribably erotic dual sensations, Gabrielle without conscious volition arched her back, and lifted her ass. Within the circlets of metal, the nipples thrusting upwards grew rock-hard. The intense pleasure-pain totally absorbing her, set her pulse pounding. When she came, the contractions convulsing the cunt awash in a flood of juice stretched on and on. When the white heat of culmination ebbed, its passing left her barely cognizant of her surroundings.

A long finger again touched the shield, causing the pain gripping loins and breasts to die away as if it had never existed.

Only dimly aware of the strong arms lifting her slack, spent body, Gabrielle yielded to their pressure. Her head lolled on her guest’s shoulder. Smiling knowingly to himself, he held her close.

When at length she stirred, he raised her to a sitting position. “You passed the test I set you, little stalwart—the first of many,” he assured her, the welcome implication prompting her to heave a sigh of pure relief. “Listen, now. I’ll tuck you into bed, shortly—leave you to weigh with exceeding care the proposal I’m about to make you. I want a slave who holds nothing back, if and when I accept her as such. In the harsh light of morning, you may well shrink from the bare idea of undergoing an initiation which I warn you, will probe the upper limits of your tolerance for pain, and put to a severe test that unstudied submissiveness which so enchants me.”

Still enveloped in the afterglow of an orgasm more fulfilling than any ever achieved with Richard, Gabrielle shivered as she digested that blunt warning, but her relief lost none of its force. “I doubt that,” she demurred. “Will you come back for me tomorrow?”

“If you wake, bathe, dress, and eat a hearty breakfast without faltering in your resolve to offer yourself as my slave, you’ll drive to the park at the end of this street. Bring nothing but a small purse in which you’ll put your automobile registration, and any medications you take daily. On the stroke of eight, you’ll pull up alongside the fountain, where you’ll see me sitting on the bench. When I reach the driver’s side of your Buick, you’ll signify that you consent to let me spirit you off to a private retreat, by handing me the keys, and sliding over to the passenger side. If at the last minute you flinch from relinquishing every iota of the firm control you habitually maintain over your life, we’ll part friends, Gabrielle, but we’ll part—cease seeing each other.”

That somber warning served only to stiffen the sensually deprived widow’s determination. “I won’t back out,” she assured him stoutly, intuitively refraining from asking how long her initiation would last.

Michael’s next words set her wondering whether he possessed the power to read her mind. “From the moment when I utilize the keys, until the time when I end the short but indefinite span of your initiation, you’ll not know from one minute to the next how this open-ended experiment geared to altering your perception of your role as a sexual partner will proceed, or how it will end. I give you only two firm guarantees. First: you’ll incur no significant injury—take no permanent harm—however intense the pain I inflict. Second, you’ll run no risk whatsoever of contracting any sexually transmitted disease.”

Slipping a hand into his inside breast pocket, the guest withdrew a sheaf of folded papers. “Tomorrow morning, you’ll read these results of my recent, comprehensive physical examination so as to set your mind at ease on that score. You’d have let me impregnate you tonight without using any form of protection, mm? Without stopping to reflect that I’ve undoubtedly fucked scores of women since you’ve known me?” Mockery tinged the voice chiding the widow flayed by her consciousness of the justice of Michael’s reproof, and scalded by shame at the intensity of the animal lust shown nakedly to this sadist who exhibited such admirable control over his own passion.

“I own to being culpably reckless,” she admitted, flushing hotly. “Michael...I can’t offer you similar reassurance. I’ll need to make an appointment...”

Tipping up her chin so that she perforce met his eyes, the advocate of safe sex correctly interpreted the bitter pain mirrored in hers. “You never indulged in any adulterous liaison, did you?” he asked, knowing the answer.

“No! Not ever! But...”

“Nor did Richard,” Michael asserted as if certain, as indeed he was. “Fourteen years of monogamy I consider an adequate safeguard. So. Bed for you, Gabrielle.” With that, he rose, and bore the woman torn between hope and fear, up the stair, and into the bedroom. Having deposited her slack, nude body in the welcoming depths of her double bed, he kissed her lightly on the forehead, murmuring, “I’ll let myself out, little voluptuary.” A few minutes later, the hostess bemused by a sexual encounter as fulfilling as it was extraordinary, heard the door close behind her departing guest.

Out of a welter of conflicting emotions, one rose to prominence: sheer, overmastering joy. Floating in a luminous bubble of euphoria, Gabrielle savored the knowledge that Michael desired her, until other considerations intruded, to dampen her spirits.

Grown hyperconscious of the touch of cool percale sheets on her bare, satiated body, she reviewed the unsettling proposal tossed into her lap by the benefactor who alleviated one thorny difficulty only to generate another. The lethargy induced by carnal release fled. Scenes from her life with Richard flashed by as if fast-forwarded, on the screen of her inner vision. Nights when she obeyed his urging to tell him what she wanted in bed, only to find that his efforts to please her generated such anxiety in him that he failed to come himself. Nights when she coaxed him into confiding what he wanted, and then strove to give it to him, with the result that he ejaculated before she grew sufficiently aroused to achieve orgasm. Nights when he experienced one of his recurring bouts of impotence. Nights when his fear of impotence proved a self-fulfilling prophecy. Rare nights when he and she lay clasped in each other’s arms, simply enjoying the closeness, and unexpectedly grew aroused enough to achieve mutual satisfaction.

Sexual intercourse with Richard, the widow reflected bleakly, always included an element of nervous dread—of failing to please, of enduring frustration, of hurting sensitive feelings, of being hurt that way.

I’m utterly fed up with battling frustration! the surviving spouse railed as her discontent with her present life rose to smite her. Tired to the bone of struggling to please a dysfunctional partner—weary of the emotional strain of making crucial, painful decisions! But do I truly want to become the slave of a fascinating but cruel master? Why does that radical notion hold such insidiously beguiling appeal?

I don’t know, but it does. The very sound of his voice makes me melt. The pain he inflicted tonight intensified the marvelous pleasure the mere touch of his fingers conferred. I want Michael’s cock in me! I want his mouth on mine, his tongue on my clit, his hands on my breasts! I want to be his slave—want him to control every aspect of my life! Why does that idea make me cream? Why? Am I temporarily deranged—unbalanced by the shock of Richard’s dying so horribly?

No. Admit the truth, woman. You dribbled hot jizz every damned time you danced with Michael. He’s haunted your dreams for years. You’re incapable of cheating on a husband—of sneaking a one-night stand behind the back of a man you knew would never cheat on you. Soiled, you’d have felt. That’s why you finally pursued the only honorable course, despite your knowing how grievously your rejecting Richard would hurt him. But now you’re free. Richard’s passed beyond suffering, and Michael wants you.

For how long?

The fear that lanced through the widowed intellectual slowly succumbing to emotional and physical exhaustion colored the unsettling dreams she failed to remember on waking.

 
 
 
Alexandra Adams: Author of Erotic Novels aadams@sexynovels.com
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